New Rules for Singing with the Choir

1   Everyone should sing the same piece.

 2   Take your time turning pages.

 3   The right note at the wrong time is the wrong note.

 4   The wrong note at the right time is still a wrong note.

 5   A wrong note sung timidly is still a wrong note.

 6   A wrong note sung with authority is an interpretation.

 7   A true interpretation is made when none note of the original notes remain.

 8   If you happen to sing a wrong note, give a nasty look to one of your neighbors.

 9   If everyone gets lost except you, follow those who get lost.

10   If a passage is difficult, slow it down. If it is easy, speed it up. Everything will work itself out in the end.

11   Markings for slurs, dynamics, ornaments and breathing should be ignored. They are only there to make the score look good.

 12  When everyone else has finished singing, you should not sing any notes you may still have left.